The fax
This happened in Rishikesh, almost 14 years ago.
Late one night, Guruji called me and gave me a slip of paper with a number on it. He told me that i should fax (emails were non existent then!) to this number a message saying that Guruji cannot make it to the function. This was one of the first things Guruji had ever told me to do.
I immediately went to the telephone booth to do it, and found that it was closed, and that they could do it only in the morning. So, i went to bed. The next morning, the slip of paper and the precious number on it had disappeared.
AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I searched and searched, retraced my steps from the phone booth, but no paper. In Rishikesh that time, from my room, you could clearly see Guruji's room. I started to look out furtively and avoid Him... and succeeded for the entire day. I hoped He would forget about it. You have NO idea the kind of mental turmoil i was having.
Then it was Satsang time. I sat at the very end of the hall, hiding behind some fat women.
Bhajans started, He glided in. For once i did all i could to hide and not get noticed...
He did His customary hmmmmm... looked straight in my direction and said, bawa have you done the fax yet? In a full satsang hall!!! I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me... everyone turned around and looked for me... i stammered, i lost the slip of paper Guruji... there was a collective gasp from the audience... He said, lost it? Oh I dont have the number, and we have to send the fax by tomorrow. How did you loose it?! Find it and do the fax by tomorrow!
All this is happening in front of 500+ people!
omygodomygodomygodomygod.... thats all i thought of during Satsang.
After Satsang, i ran to my room and started to methodically search for that $%^## slip of paper. It had simply vanished from the earth. I searched everywhere. Even on top of the fan blades. Then i searched again, and somewhere fell asleep... woke up early morning with a start and searched yet again, and again... i was exhausted... deep gloom... darkness all around in the middle of the afternoon...
Then i just sat down and prayed. I told Guruji (in my head), that i had really really done all i possibly could to find that paper, but i had failed. I really needed His help and His forgiveness...
and no, what happened is not what you think would happen... i didn't miraculously find the paper.
But Guruji called me to His room. He asked me again, did you do the fax? I said with a very heavy heart that i couldn't find the paper. He just smiled and hugged me and said
don't worry, that person just called up now, and I talked to him and told him I cant come... Do you want a sweet?
What relief!! What joy!!! The sun was shining again, the birds were singing and the roses were blooming...
An important lesson learned: Running away from Guruji is never a solution, He can be quite brutal! :). Help will be given and forgiveness is assured, but ONLY when you surrender... and that happens only when you give your 100%... and failing or succeeding is not the point... just giving your 100% and praying.
Jai Gurudeva!
love
bawa
21 comments:
Jai Gurudev Bau...
all the posts are superb! specially the Alibaug snaps ;)
Your every experience is ..just woww!! love it :)
again.. "Do you want a sweet?" is too sweet. :)
Very sweet post :) [loads of sweets here] :P he he he he :)
oh god...this was so beautiful.....
I am close to tears..Guruji is the Sultan of our hearts ;)
haha I know this feeling soooo well...everytime I tried to hide the blow was brutal..but when I honestly gave my 100 % effort and sincerely surrendered...the solution would appear on it own. :) JGD !
BAWA PLEASE TWITTER :) ALL THE TIME!!!!
That was beautifully written as usual .. and very clear. Thanks!
I'm wondering: what does it take to be in touch with Guruji directly like you are ?
guruji was angry or brutal there(LOL)
Rendered Speechless!!!
Only a bhakta can comprehend the connection between a Master and a disciple...
To me, its the deepest connection that I carry.... more than my parents, mate, whoever..
Sooo beautiful!!!! :-)
woooow !! If not for Guruji, we would not have known that so much unconditional love is even possible !
Thank you Guruji, thanks a ton for coming here for us..thank you thank you thank you ...:-)
JGD
Siri
I really learnt something today !! thank you bawa!!!!
yes, please do tweet (or twitter :)
- all the time!
Jai Gurudev Bau.....i opened the blog in the evening break wondering what it will be and i saw the picture and was happy to literally gobble up the story.....its touching to relate as we have gone through the same situations with you :D Hug...Love,
My God, you write so well.... Laughed so much. Thank you Bawa for sharing your stories.... find you to be so accessible.... one would think being a big teacher like you would mean sitting somewhere up there... but find you to be so down to earth. Thank you Guruji for all your love and Thank you Guruji for Bawa.
Lots of love. JGD. Sunita
Dear Bawa, Jai Gurudev. If you don't mind, please change all the i's to I's in your blog ;-). You are a youth teacher I agree, but please don't start writing like the teenagers of today. Their english is totally gone. Deciphering what they are writing is like trying to understand Greek & Latin.
-- from a 30 something fan of yours.
Hahahahha Bau its really beautiful experience. Master is a Master, an ocean of love. An unending ocean. Love this post Bau, its really interesting.
I think your remark on failing or succeeding not being the point was one of the most important points of the post .. especially coming from a (now?)oh-so-successful person! .. Its such a success-only- world today that one tends to forget this point most of the time ..
hey bawa that is a cool post
excellent experince..
It si simply touching bau...Thanks a lot for sharing ur intimate experiences with Guruji..It was a great learning from this post.. Luv from Pramod
JGD
dear bawa,
the four days of the course(yes+ chennai) was like 4 years of college*(minus semester xams)i thoroughly enjoyed it and i sincerely thank you and assure you that our efforts(kriya,yours and Dinesh bhaiya's guidance and ofcourse my presence) will definitely be of a great use.
JGD
:)
*i'm not from IIT bombay(hehehe)
P.S like in the satsang i've noticed a lot of smiles':)'on your blog)
thanks bauuuuu..needed this badly
ohmygodohmygodohmygod!! loveddDD this post. hilarious!!
hahahahaha!! well, while reading this (really) well written post, i was actually quite animated with my emotions 'ufff' and 'oh NO' (n Bawa, be assured you were not the only one cursin' that $^%#*#$ paper. haha) and finally 'waaaahhhhh...'
love you all :D
what a post. haha!!
One of the best posts!! I love what you wrote, the way you wrote.. too good!! Even laughed when you said you tried to hide behind a fat lady during satsang :) and ohhhh 'do you want a sweet?' .. so sweeeeeeeeet :) He's the best..
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