Dinesh and Bawa

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Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Some fun

I have been reading some really funny stuff lately, thought i would share some one liners with you guys:

Don't worry, Rome wasn't burned in a day - Douglas Adams

Winston Chruchill when asked to give a short talk on sex: Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure! (and then he sat down)

If that had gone in, it would have been a goal! - David Coleman

We didn't lose the game, we just ran out of time... - Vince Lombardi

If at first you don't succeed, reload and try again. - Scott Adams

I felt like a man trapped in a woman's body. Then i was born! - Chris Bliss



The longest sentence you can form with two words is "I do" - H.L. Mencken

When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the bible and we had the land. They said "Let us pray." We closed our eyes. When we opened them, we had the bible, and they had the land! - Archbishop Desmond Tutu

He has a face that would convince you that God is a cartoonist - Jack Kroll

Don't pay any attention to the critics, don't even ignore them. - Sam Goldwyn

I told my mom, i am going to run away from home. She said, "On your marks..." - Rodney Dangerfield

My mother hated me. She once took me to an orphanage and asked me to mingle. - Joan Rivers

In olden time sacrifices were made at the Altar. It's a practice that still continues. - Helen Rowland

My wife and i were happy for 20 years. then we met. - Rodney Dangerfield

When i hear people sigh, "Life is hard", I am always tempted to ask compared to what?! - Sydney Harris

Here's a tip to stop smoking: Douse yourself with petrol everyday. - Bill bailey

Today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. - Mark Twain

Rembrandt painted 700 pictures. Of these 3000 are still in existence. - Wilhelm Bode

Until further notice, celebrate everything - Bawa (really!)

Jai Gurudeva!
love
bawa

ps did you like them? do you want more of this? Maybe once a week or every 15 days? Tell me by leaving some comments

pps Very few people reading and commenting on blog sutras? Do i continue?  

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59 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah they r really nice ones.

Regards,
Simran

Shruti said...

yes bau.. :-)

i would love to read it once a week .. :-)

thanks.. :-)

luv u..

..Shruti

Shruti said...

the one-liners were too guuud... bawa.. :-)
really amazing.. :-)

hamsa_tachyon said...

yes, yes to all the questions ! :)
some fun would be fun :)
i think your blog sutras would be really useful .. am not sure most of us can keep pace with you, but we'd probably catch up eventually .. :)

komal said...

jai gurudev bawu,
i loved this one.especially the last one. it would be nice to see more of this on the blog . you could even post funny one liners by aol teachers and volunteers too from what you hear around am sure it would make an awesome post and an even more interesting read. As far as blogsutras goes please do continue i for one love the tips on blogsutras.why dont you paste a link of blogsutras on this blog am sure many more would read it then. I know this is a really long comment but..... i just ahd to write everything..JGD..

gitanjali said...

Too Good Bawa :)
Ya! Please Continue posting these ones once a week :)

atmarati avirodhena said...

Awesome bawa !!!! esp the one bout god being a cartoonist .. he he

one every week please :):):)
jai gurudeva

nalini said...

We want more of this kind.
Nalini

Vishal said...

hi bawa and dinesh ,
really really funny stuff , i feel put a few everyday . its really fun reading such things .
jai gurudev
vishal

Anonymous said...

I really loved this one :)

Here's a tip to stop smoking: Douse yourself with petrol everyday. - Bill bailey

Pls do keep them coming!

JGD,
Kaushik

annam said...

Dear Bau, they were really nice. pls continue with blogsutra...may be many are reading but not commenting. for the first time bloggers it is very useful.

gauri said...

The best one of all is yours... its cool and hits you and makes you laugh as well.... loved all of them....every 15 days is really cool maybe we can also have complete the sentence kind of a competition earliest correct comment wins....

Trinaa said...

:DDDDDDDDD...i think ur one liner wins hands down.. :))

pushya said...

DEFINITELY, we wud love to have more bau...

The tip for smokers was COOL !!

Jai Gurudev !!

Raghav said...

Some of them were aweosome and the rest i couldnt understand :)

Please post these onliners now and then Bau. they are fun to read.

Anand said...

Please continue bau... i read ur blogs like daily practices.. infact added all of them on my blog roll.. :)
last of the one liner was good.. heres another one i heard from Rishi Vidyadhar ji 'God is neither an economist nor communist'

Vishal said...

Yep .. i love one liners ..
am familiar with some of them already .. really enjoyed the new ones .. please do post when ever u come across such witty ones .. :)

malathy e said...

hi !!!!!!!
hope u r fine
the first few and some last ones were gud.....
jokes will always bring smile so do post them whenever u can
take care

Harsha Vardhan M.V said...

Rembrandt painted 700 pictures. Of these 3000 are still in existence. - Wilhelm Bode
lol
loved this one
yes bau i would love reading more of these..

amit said...

Bau, these are too good ! do continue to post them.
your blog helps to breaks all the patterns :)

Shweta Desai said...

That post made my day.... Rather night. Doesnt matter though. It was really a good post Bau, as always...

Love You Bau... Life's so much fun and informative with all your posts...

roo"kie-run" said...

Keep them coming :)

Raghavan said...

nice ones Bawa :)

bout the blogsutras, i have a suggestion/ It a new blog for folks to remember whereas this one has an established brand identity that many of us check without fail everday.

It would be great if you cross posted the link on this blog .

Jai Guru Dev,

richa said...

hi bau, these one liners are awesome.we would like more of these from u every week,jai gurudeva

Anonymous said...

Hilarious one liners, enjoyed very much :) Please continue blog sutras, they are really good.

gt said...

really refreshing... how about posting one daily... :-)

Anupam Gupta said...

hey bau...well amazing ones...a few really really made me laugh out loud...feels great u know..

please do keep posting these once a week or something...will be interesting...

ohh and sorry about not posting on blogsutras...actually totally forgot about it....:D...sorry bau...

love
anupam.

Erica said...

Hi bau,
they are really nice to read ..
may be once in fortnight!

bhawana said...

Yes Bau more of these
Love
Jai gurudev

Swapnil said...

they r nice but not as good as Guru stories. Once in twice a week will be good.

Seema said...

Hilarious & subtle. They are awesome, Bau Please , can we have more of them, everyday ;) (?)

love you,

SIDDHESHWAR said...

thats AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monica said...

hrer's one more:
'42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.'
Bawum kkep them coming :D

Monica said...

and your one liner was superb :D hehe.

Monica said...

'Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of. ' haha!

Vinod Raghavan said...

yup Bawu..some more please for sure & many more!

Z said...

Fabulous Jokes Bawa. I liked the one about how to stop smoking, good tip to give friends who seem not to be able to do so.. :) - Durga

priy@nk@ said...

hi Bau!!
it was fun reading them..
the best was the last one:-)
it wuld be good to have them once a week..
JGD!

HP said...

haha... loved them !

Anonymous said...

They are really nice.
I would LOVE 2 read them every week. Keep them coming.
Jai Gurudev.
Vaidehi.

megha said...

oh plz plz plz keep sending them..the best one was yours "until further notice..."

and this today is the tomorrow u worried about yesterday is the line from jonathan.."

Pragya Rathore said...

Jai Gurudev bau,
the one liners are awesome, please post once a week, it would be great fun...
Pragya

anshul said...

bau the one liners were great please add as much as you can

Saleel Pulekar said...

bau, like everyth else in your blog, these funny one liners are too good....pl post them once a week atleast!

love u bau, jgd, Saleel

Abhay Karnataki said...

yes Bau!
send in once in 10 days!

And plz plz comment on my blog.. its here:
http://2hitchhikers.blogspot.com/

NITISH CHHABRA said...

jai gurudeva bau..
this is really cool.. plz keep posting such stuff. i just loved it ... :)

Vini said...

Bau......... We literally r addicted to the blog.......... So plz continue....... N the more quotes given by u the more joyfulll. N u need not type really after ur QUOTE........ WE believe u:)
jai guru deva bawa

sharika said...

i really like them , i think 5 per week is fine.. this time there were too many:)
jgd,
sharika

Chao said...

yes please! weekly/ fortnightly...anythings good...thanks for the laugh Bawa :)

Sharada said...

Heh heh! Bawa, these were hilarious! Please put up more! By the way, I thought you might the link to these Groucho Marx quotes:

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Groucho_Marx

pranav said...

excellent one-liners Bawa. the talk on Guru-purnima was fantastic,informative, something that made a lot of realizations.
thank you

Vineet said...

Hilarious & subtle. They are awesome, Bau Please , can we have more of them, everyday ;) (?)

love you,
Bawa

GauravNath said...

Totally loved them...
true Guru+Deva liners :-)

meenal said...

Hi. It's nice and so pl continue. Your blog is really very interesting and i am learning a lot. Thanks for all this.
Lots of love,
Meenal

Abhinand said...

Hi Bawa!
Thanx for the funny quotes!

Here are some I compiled from the net again....

"If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either."
--Dick Cavett

"I don't get no respect. I played hide-and-seek, and they wouldn't even look for me."
--Rodney Dangerfield

"You guys line up alphabetically by height."
-- Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach

"I grew up in a tough neighborhood. Tough neighborhood! Teachers would get notes from parents saying, 'Please excuse Johnny for the next 5 to 10 years!'"
--Rodney Dangerfield

And my favorite...

"USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population."
--David Letterman

-
Love, Abhinand

Sid said...

BAU !!!! once a week is too slow....how abt once in 3 days??

Abhi said...

Of course!
'Yeh Dil Maange moooooooore !'

shravanth said...

heh heh..loved some of them bawa...would be great if we can have them every week.......thanx in advance

Niyati said...

yeah...these were fantastic...!! :)

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